Healing the Wounded Maiden in Sacred Spaces

There is a big issue at the moment with wounding perpetuation in healing spaces (one-to-one and groups). 

This is something that can be prevented with proper and ongoing training.

Most of us go to one-to-one sessions or ceremonial spaces to heal our wounds and to gain insight and perspective on our lives.  We feel disconnected from Great Spirit and ourselves  - our souls are calling out for reconnection, community and to experience the Other in some way.

This is wonderful and a step in the right direction to deprogram and start living a more authentic life. 

Trouble is, if you are entering a space that is run by a wounded maiden (the wounded knight will be another post) who is not much further on their healing path with little more experience than yourself,  you will most likely have your wounds perpetuated, along with a big dose of karmic entanglement with the facilitator and the spirits invoked. 

This may cause a potential loss of power to shadow beings.  I have experienced this and I see it over and over again.  Everyone wants to include “spirit” in their work but not many are willing to do the training and work required.

The truth is, most of us started seeing one-to-one clients and/or running circles, spaces and ceremonies before we were truly ready. 

Healing our wounds and shadows is a non-negotiable ongoing process for a facilitator.  Learning how to work with Spirit with respect, honour and integrity is also non-negotiable. In other words, these are not mutually exclusive.

My journey began back in the day where it was typically "accepted" to train for about 5-10 years to master something and then start – even then, looking back I wasn’t ready. 

Currently, people start running ceremonies, holding containers and training others after as little as a weekend workshop or with no training at all.   The other issue is that most therapy and facilitator trainings don’t cover the energetics and spiritual aspects of space holding.  

Lack of training and inner work creates spaces where the wounded facilitator perpetuates their wounds in the space.  And as participants may be none the wiser, this collective lack of awareness makes the wound bigger and bigger.  A hidden wound is a shadow and so the entire space becomes a place for more shadow and pain.  Authentic healing spaces are in fact a rare breed nowadays.

One of the biggest facilitator archetypes is the wounded maiden (maiden can be any age as some women never move on from this inner archetype as it’s perpetuated by society to stay a maiden forever). 

The wounded maiden cannot get enough validation. 

The entire session or space is designed to validate her delusions of grandeur and the wound of being the “special one” or the “chosen one” is aggrandised.  The wound attracts the wound and because participants have the same wound they cannot see what's happening and will even encourage the spaceholder.

However, I have found that almost everyone has an intuitive knowing that something is 'off' but largely ignores it as we are wired to “fit in” or "belong".  It’s a gross mess of energies and power abuse.  This is very common, especially in “priestess” and “shamanic trainings”.  The spaces just churn out more wounded maidens.

The wounded maiden may also play out her mother wounds in the space by trying to rescue everyone or projecting her mother on participants. 

Her father wound may play out via her wealthier, older partner. 

Her never ending need for validation is the constant parading of “achievements”, half naked posts to show her “power” and claiming medicine beyond her years. 

Her “medicine woman” programme will graduate you in 3 months, yet she’s never met her own inner dark feminine or had any true initiations, it’s all smoke and mirrors.  The blind is leading the blind and everyone is walking away just as wounded, ready to set up their own clinics and spaces. 

Everything is magnified in sacred space and this is where the wounds are masqueraded as “being in your power”, “claiming your worth”, “stepping into your magnificence”.  People may feel they are getting healed, however, never forget that astral shadow beings can put on a show too. 

The reality is that we have all been the wounded maiden.  The first step towards healing starts with admitting we are wounded and facing our shadows. 

We must let go of entitlement and princess programming and take a sober look at the chaos we have contributed to ourselves and others. 

In my case, I had to start again after 10 years as most of what I was doing was new age nonsense. 

Managing our wounds in sacred space is non negotiable for ethical facilitators.  This leads to more powerful group work where genuine healing takes place. 

You can lead a life where you are an integral leader sincerely and responsibly supporting others in their awakening journey. 

If you would like to work on your Maiden Wound let me know as I am happy to set up a one off healing circle for up to 13 women. These types of circles need to be kept small to enable all energies present to be witnessed with love and compassion.